It’s been about a week since I posted my first blog post in about two years, and I was so excited about it and thought I would be posting every week day. I think what happened was the next day I did try to write another post but I was quite rushed as I had a lot to do that day and I wasn’t happy with what I’d written and then didn’t have the time to go back and edit it. Then, the long Easter weekend started and I was running quite early in the morning for the next three days and then there was a family celebration on Easter Sunday. I came back home on Monday, around noon, absolutely exhausted, with work to do, and feeling like there wasn’t enough time to do anything. Yesterday, I have to say I don’t think I even thought about blogging as I still felt like I was playing catch up from the weekend. But today I’ve finally realised that there’s no reason I can’t write something. I just have to get it done!
But that account is why I often don’t look forward to these big holidays that everyone else seems to love. It always creates stress for me afterwards. I enjoyed the weekend, but I had to sacrifice a lot of things that are important to me, mostly writing and reading, but also stuff like gardening, which I like to do a little bit of every day as I’m not particularly keen on marathon gardening sessions. Also, with simple things like keeping on top of the housework, I’m just someone who prefers to get into a routine and do a tiny bit every single day, so that it doesn’t build up and get overwhelming. But after a holiday, that’s how I feel every single time: overwhelmed with all the work that has built up, not to mention that I’ve become used to eating what I wanted, maybe drinking alcohol a bit more often than normal, and also just sitting around and not doing anything. I find it incredibly hard to get back into my routine, to the extent that it just doesn’t feel worth having the time off to me!
I feel the same way after actual vacation holidays as well, more so in fact, although because I usually choose to do them, as opposed to public holidays which are kind of enforced on me, I’m usually less resentful of them! I think I might be getting better at recovering from these heinous events though! And it does make me appreciate my everyday life more too. I think this is just a consequence of living your life differently to the majority of people. If you are going out to work, especially to a job you don’t especially like, and if you spend most of your time firefighting and barely keeping on top of things, with not enough leisure time, like I used to years ago when I worked in an office, then these breaks are just essential to recharge your batteries. It always seems like loads of people are out in their gardens getting stuff done during these holidays as well, whereas I always have more time to do stuff at my house and garden during the regular working week. The same thing happens to me to an extent every weekend in fact. My weekends are BUSIER than my weekdays, because I run both Saturday and Sunday, usually with other people and fairly early in the morning, and then I’m often out of the house being sociable for a couple of meals too. During the week, because I work from home, I feel like I have quite a lot more time to just get little things done, stay on top of things, and I even have a lot more space in my day to relax, usually.
So, I’m just at odds with most of the rest of the world, it sometimes seems!
Anyway, I was going to talk about my No TV challenge that I was SO excited about in my last post. I broke the rules: I had a whole day of watching cycling on Monday. I could feel the temptation creeping up on me over the weekend, to watch Paris Roubaix, which is a pretty exciting event, and on Monday I was just feeling so tired that I succumbed. I don’t think I would have got much done even if I’d resisted the TV. I might have just had a nap and read something. I did get a bit of gardening done before watching TV, so really the only thing I might have done is some volunteer work, which didn’t HAVE to be done then anyway. I also played iPad games while watching the cycling, and stayed up really late to watch the end of it. So, all in all, the worst possible example of watching TV and the reason I decided to start the ban in the first place! But I have to say that yesterday I just went straight back to following the rules and didn’t feel any particular desire to break them, even with the iPad games. So, maybe a more moderate approach will work this time. There is another big cycle race this coming weekend so we’ll have to see if I’m tempted again. All in all, I’m wondering if watching TV does sometimes play a useful role in helping me to relax and recover from training and general busyness. I was doing some reading of other people who’ve tried banning TV, and there was a bit of a feeling among them that they missed it and really felt that it was a necessary thing for them. If I could just watch TV once a week then that would probably be better than forcing myself to do the full 30 days without it, only to crash back into watching every day once the 30 days was up. So, we’ll see.