So I don’t know if this is going to be a blog post but I was thinking about DDT, because her forgiveness work is basically just like ACIM and the LOA, and if she really has forgiven so much and cleared so much then does that mean she is really living a miraculous life? I mean certainly it seems like she has everything financially, and in terms of love she has this seemingly great hubbie, and kids, and everything is done for her and that house – OMG – I think actually seeing it, and the video, brought home to me what a fantastic lifestyle some people have and how completely on another level it is from my lifestyle.
I feel like some of the message gets lost in her focus on the actual, material, wealth stuff. And ditto with Kat. And if you’re a long way behind, i.e. you are not able to forgive and clear your past OR your present situation, and get rid of the fear and the doubt and the anger and the frustration, you just end up seeing all these “trinkets”, ok let’s be honest and clear here, these frankly amazing lifestyles these women have, and you just end up pushing and trying and wanting and wishing but never actually believing you can really have them yourself and it just becomes the very opposite of helpful. And it’s not that their message isn’t valid or helpful to the right people, but more that, when you have so much less than them, when your life is frankly shit in so many ways and you feel actually pretty close to completely HELPLESS in so many areas, it just makes you feel worse and obviously feeling worse is NOT helpful.
Now that I’m studying ACIM every day and also some other books like Joe Vitale’s Zero Limits, the Abraham Hicks stuff, Wayne Dyer’s stuff and Marianne Williamson’s books, I’m really starting to see it all being the same thing actually. Different approaches and perspectives and even maybe goals, or at least the way the goals are stated are maybe a little different. Some focus on pure happiness, others on material stuff, some on a combination of the two. It’s all starting to come together as part of the very same thing. Which is great because I’m no longer feeling confused and frustrated about having to choose between the two, spirituality and materiality; happiness and contentment versus achieving stuff and getting what I want, which I think is how I’ve felt for years and I’ve kept going back and forth continually, between real-world action and life hacks, and then on the other side, forgiveness work and acceptance and flow and letting it be EASY, which sometimes feels like giving up on your dreams.
I’m also starting to get the confidence to actually adapt what I’m learning, such as the techniques for accepting and finding peace and forgiveness, to make it actually work for me. Not everyone is the same, we all learn in different ways and I’ve realised that writing stuff down is how I learn. So these techniques that are sort of all in your head, well I struggle with them. I just wrote 2,000 words just trying to get to the bottom of what was bothering me this morning. It might not always take that but I think I shouldn’t RESIST doing that work just because someone else recommends a different approach. Because I think, for me, when I TRY not to focus on the negative, to the extent that I don’t want to even write down a negative thought, I just get stuck. The negative thought is still in there under the surface, but I’m not dealing with it.
Similarly, I’ve gone back and forth for ages on whether or not goals are a good thing. Because some people say they’re essential and others say they’re the opposite of helpful! The answer is probably that sometimes they’re helpful and sometimes not, and for some people they’re helpful and for others not! So mostly I think I like having goals and specific tasks to get done. Otherwise, I just sort of get lost and almost bored and directionless, and that makes me unhappy. Obviously, if I found at some point that the goals and planning were no longer helping me, I would give it a rest for a while.
It sounds a bit “duh” when I write it out like this, but it’s amazing how many self-help and spirituality books preach ONE WAY of doing things and make it seem like if you don’t do it that way you’ll never succeed. To her credit, DDT says “throw everything at it”. But I think I’ve struggled for so long with actually getting any consistent results from this stuff precisely because I felt I had to choose between going for it and letting it be easy. And I think that is because a lot of people who talk about LOA talk about what you GET when you apply it, in terms of wealth and all the good stuff that you want, whereas on the other side you have people talking about joy and love as if you should ONLY want that stuff and the material stuff doesn’t matter.
As usual I don’t know how to finish this post, it’s really just a little thought I had about trying to meld these two approaches that sometimes seem poles apart but really, I think, are exactly the same. An approach to living your life that is joyful, productive, and easy, which can only be a good thing.