It seems to be so easy to let a day go by without posting, and then another one, and before you know it you have completely let go of a habit that you felt you were really enjoying and completing easily. For me, especially with blogging, because it tends to be one of the last tasks in my morning routine, and it’s something I find harder to do once I’ve entered the real world and left the house or had a conversation with someone else or messaged someone or checked my email, I find it really easy to just not be able to get it done on some days. There are a few days each week where I’m in a rush in the morning for whatever reason, and on those days it’s blogging that gets missed out. Whereas other tasks like completing a lesson on Duolingo can easily be fitted in at the end of the day, with blogging I think I still feel like conditions have to be perfect.
Thinking about it, I do that with quite a few jobs. I often put off cleaning or other house jobs until a day when I can really tackle it properly, when in fact if I just squeezed in 10 minutes here and there, I’d probably be able to keep my house clean and tidy quite effortlessly all the year round. I do the same with gardening, probably to a worse extent because if it’s raining or dark I am very unlikely to do it. I have got a little better at getting my running done even if the circumstances aren’t perfect, although I still do mostly get it done as early as possible in the day. It used to be almost impossible for me to run after about 9:30am on my own, but I do now sometimes manage to fit it in as late as 12, although I still don’t like leaving it until that late.
I’m better at doing my work later in the day now as well, even though again I do prefer to do it like most things as early as I possibly can in the day. I’m struck, today, by how much more energy I feel I have, after about a week of tapering ready for my ultra, and probably eating a bit more than usual too. I think normally on a Wednesday, after a tough running club session on a Tuesday night, then getting up early for a French lesson on a Wednesday morning, possibly not sleeping too well due to the running, and then feeling like I have to squeeze a lot into the day when I’m already tired, and time-pressured, well I just often feel like I’m dragging myself through life. It helps that I’m short of work again this week so I don’t actually have much to do today, but I also can’t help wondering if the way I train (and possibly eat) is actually good for me.
I haven’t really seen much information on this kind of thing in fact. I have to say as well that I haven’t really found any running (or any) YouTubers who are 50 year old women. Maybe my age group just aren’t into YouTubeing. Maybe it’s harder to get a following at that age because people naturally want to see the young, the beautiful, the fast? But regardless I don’t seem to see much information on general tiredness from running. There’s stuff on the more extreme burnout, where you really have overtrained/undereaten to the point where you start to just feel like you can’t run at all. That’s a fairly serious condition that can last for months and can require a complete rest from running.
But I’m talking more about just generally feeling exhausted pretty much all the time. Aching, feeling like you want to go back to sleep, feeling hungry, needing a nap. The thing is, I’ve come to accept it as just what you have to do to get fitter. But is that even true? One of the reasons I decided to quit marathons for a bit and focus on halves is that I seem to have gotten sick (i.e. ill, with a cold or the flu) before every marathon I’ve trained for over the last few years. Every time I seem to get to peak fitness. I feel amazing. I’m running well. I’m feeling strong. And then the next thing I know I’m made up with cold, and not just a normal cold but one that won’t let go of me and trashes my chances of running well or even running at all in the marathon.
So I was already thinking last year that I must be doing something wrong. Because surely trying to be as fit and fast as you possibly can be should be GOOD for you. It shouldn’t have a negative effect on your life, right? I’m going to have to see what transpires post-ultra. After I’ve recovered from it and can start training again, I want to keep a real eye on how I feel from day to day, because surely I SHOULD be feeling good like I am now, peppy, energetic, enthusiastic, and looking forward to life, not just getting through the next task and then the next?
It’s a work in progress. As is this blog. I feel like today’s post started in one place and finished in another, but at least it is done. And that’s good enough for now.